Musical Blues

Dear Mr. Rahman,

Let me introduce myself as a BIIIG fan of your music. When I heard Roja for the first time, it had an impact on me that no other album (not even any of yours) could hope to give. It was an entirely new sound that I was hearing, and if I were forced to pick one word to describe it, it would be “Sophisticated”. The recording was suave, and the use of percussions was a leap from the days of the drums used in the interludes of “Ninnukori Varnam”. Yup, the beats sounding like they never had before, gave an entirely new dimension to experiencing songs, even simple tunes like “Rukumani Rukumani”. It was not that only the beats or tunes alone contributed to the greatness of the songs. It was the entire experience of listening to the guitar strings and the keyboard opening the song by slowing raising the tempo and suddenly finding beats which sounded like digital water droplets falling on the ground accompanying a chilly folk humming, setting the ground for the lines “Pudhu Vellai Mazhai” to be sung. I experienced Goosebumps every time they played the song on the show they called “Oliyum Oliyum”, and Sir, Kafam Fe; I get the same haunting feeling even today.

And you wouldn’t stop with it. Film after film, you upped the ante, and we were left gasping for more. Gentleman, Kadhalan, Indian, Bombay followed and I was hearing the songs not just in “Oliyum OLiyum” (Sheesh…how do I differentiate the two Tamil “L’s in English) but also in “Ek Se Badkar Ek” (The Hindi songs countdown). You were a national rage. And it swelled me with Illad Pride that you were recognized as a legend Pan-India. “Chayya Chayya” was hailed as the new National Anthem. As the years rolled by and you brought a new shelf for keeping all those awards, the whole world became a stage for you with “Bombay Dreams”. Madras became Chennai, and I still used to wait eagerly for your albums, but was getting irritated and impatient by the day as the wait was too long for each one to come out. Like jerking off in old age.

Cut to the present. When a new movie of yours releases, it’s no longer the sense of anticipation that I experience. It’s more of an eerie trepidation, the sort of feeling you get when the results of an examination are announced, and you have no clue as to how you have done. And invariably when I hear the music for the first time, there is a sinking feeling. “What sort of music is this? I don’t like it. The previous album was much better”. But then, the Google Talk statuses pop up one by one. “Fiqrana!”.”Shanno Shanno!”. You even have a new moniker as evinced by the Tweets about “ARR rocks”. And Facebook walls are filled with your other sobriquet that only Pulitzer winners could have come up with: “The Mozart of Madras delivers. Yet again!” “Isai Puyal” is passé. After all, you now belong to the whole of India. How could we bind you to our hometown with vernacular epithets?

And then, the Human Mind starts thinking.” Hey! How could the whole world like the music except you? It means there is something wrong with you. I always maintain that you don’t listen to those English songs. It’s the reasons why you don’t win quizzes. It’s also the reason you are not able to appreciate the World Influences of Rahman’s music. Look at you. You are listening to Chinna Kannan Azhaikkiraan by Ilayaraja right now. You are being insanely romantic about an era you are not even familiar with. You are caught in a time warp. Look at your juniors. They are swayed by the music as the children to the music of the Pied Piper of Hamlin And look at you. You have enqueued “Choole Le Ne Do Nazuk Hoton” by Mohd. Rafi. Does your dad listen to these songs? You need to Wake Up Sid! Listen to the gems from Rahman’s latest jewel box. Follow this psuedocode:

Function likeARR(input song)

While( song.liked=False)

Song.play;

Return song.liked;

And when I finally break out of the seemingly infinite loop, I am convinced. No, self indoctrinated. “ I love the songs. Look at the layers of the music behind the veneer of the tune. It’s truly class. Keep Bass low. Raise the volume. You will hear those magical seconds of the guitar. You couldn’t have heard it the first time. That’s why you should listen to the songs over and over again. Each listening experience is truly a revelation. The songs are so deep. ARR is ARR.”

But sometimes, sanity prevails. Like it happened with “Blue”. No amount of brain-washing could lead me to such an inebriated condition as to like the songs. I have not listened to Kylie Minogue before. So, you couldn’t tempt me with that carrot. The Udit Narayan song sounds like the “Dance Pe Chance” in “Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi”. I can’t understand the fuss behind “Fiqrana”. I like “Aaj Dil Gustakh hain”. Though it’s not great.

The sad truth with Blue is had it been done by someone else, (say Yuvan Shankar Raja), it would have been a great attempt by their standards. And paradoxically, it wouldn’t have got the same attention. But you Mr. Rahman are a demi-god. You could have babbled in speech and it would sound like “Narumugaiye”. How could you bring yourself to compose this drivel by your standards? Or maybe you knew how the film would shape into. So didn’t bother trying to salvage a sinking ship. After all, it’s an Underwater Adventure Film. The sinking ship would anyways go where it belonged. Underwater. Maybe you are pissed that someone as undeserving as Zayed Khan manages to sneakily co-star with a bevy of stars in movies which you compose music for with alarming frequency. Maybe you are trying a paradigm shift in the Indian music scene by moving the focus on the tune and its melodic content to a futuristic music setting where the tune takes a backseat and only the “sound” of the song matters. Maybe you fused this with the concept of stand-up comedy, by having tunes which are effectively one-liners, like the jokes dished out by the comedians. Feed the one-liner into a loop machine. Add layers of technology. Voila! Song Composed Manufactured.

Your early songs were all durable. I can still listen to “Chikku Bukku Rayile” with the same excitement as I did when I was six. But I already yawn at “Shanno Shanno”. Is it that you were an idealist youth then, and have been beaten down by age? Are you trying to prove with your present music that life itself is ephemeral, and nothing contrary to its fleetingness should be attempted? With all digital the sampling in your songs, are you trying to showcase the polarity of the views and the Manichean outlook that we seem to have towards life, universe and everything? Is it a lament on the binary distinction between the haves and have-nots? Are all those layers and layers of music a stark comment on the pervasiveness of Technology in Man’s life ? Is it an oblique reference to how complex life has become now, compared to the simple but creative life that Man led before, using Raja’s music as a metaphor? Or are you having a ball of a time playing “Emperor’s New Clothes” on a scale never attempted before?

At this moment, a line from “Padariyen Padipparieyen” in “Sindhu Bhairavi” comes to mind.

“Ennavo Raagam, Ennannavo Thaalam
Thalaya Aattum Puriyaadha Koottam”

It’s funny I had to choose a line from a Raja composition. Is it because your songs preclude lyrics gaining any important over your music that I was not able to recollect anything meaningful to put here? It’s also a bizarre coincidence that through the course of writing this letter, there was not even a single song composed by you in my playlist. Or is it?

I don’t want the sampling. I don’t want all those layers of music. I don’t want the technology. Just give me Rahman without the frills.

Yours lovingly

Ajay

Valhalla and Ilayaraja

It's 11 in the night. I am about to make my bed. Mom and Dad are already asleep. I keep the TV volume to a nearly inaudible low. I go to my room to check if my laptop has been shut down. From the living room, the sound of guitar repeatedly strumming a set of notes emanates. From the Idiot Box. I know the tune. One whiff of the music and I know what's being played. I rush to the living room with the glee of a child rushing to meet its Christmas presents from Santa. The concern for my parent's need to catch some Z's vanishes in thin air as I accelerate the volume up. After all, even if they wake up, they wouldn't mind listening to this; I console the angel in me.

The Pallavi begins shyly, giving glimpses of the genius to come. Almost like a shy bride, singing for her in-laws and fiancee when they have come to her place to see her and judge her worthiness. Like how she starts coyly, but within that demure cantabile, she impresses them. The would-be groom expectantly looks at his father, who is overjoyed. The mother is unmoved, however is waiting to hear how the song unfolds.

The first line is simple. Has only 1 Swara. Anyone who randomly places the bow of a violin to a string in the middle would get the sound. 1 Swara. Only Sa. 1 Swara.

As the song plays out, the violin faithfully accompanies, giving an almost aching end to the otherwise cheerful lines of melody.

There is no fuss about the song. There are no layers of music. No fancy digital sampling. No unheard-of-instruments captured by a synthesizer. The beats don't beat down the lyrics. There are few instruments. The violin, the Veena, the flute, the keyboard and drums. Nothing fancy. For most of the song, they don't try to overshadow the singer. SPB. No one could have sung it better. Even if it were sung better, it wouldn't have sounded like SPB. And it wouldn't be the same song.

The interlude flows by. The Carnatic extends its hands to the Western in a dignified manner. Starting with the flute, it progresses to the keyboard till the violins take over. All the while, known only to the discerning listener, the background beats is provided by Drums! In an unassuming way, no grand Thani Avartanam for the drums here. And with that, a whole generation was introduced to the composer's brand of East-meets-West music in a subtle way.

In the semi-classical Charanams that follow, the music also pushes the lyrics into the frontstage. Few composers have been gracious enough to give an equal importance to lyrics in the song. As the Charanam reaches a crescendo towards the end, the lines become bolder :

"Kaigal idaithanil nuzhaigayil idaiveli kuraigaiyil
eriyum vilakku siriththu kangal moodum "

(As the hands clasp and the gap between the lovers reduces, the burning lamp laughs and closes its eyes in shame). Incidentally a similar imagery is used in the Charanams of "Nenjinile Nenjinile" from "Uyire".

Sample this in the next Charanam :

"Viyarviyin mazhailae payiraagum paruvamae"
(In the rain of sweat that arises out of sexual tension, the youth gets fructified and harvested)
Bold lines for 1982. And till date, our lyricists keep harping around similar ideas about love.

Probably the only sore note about the song is its picturization. The beautiful melody is reduced to an amateur gymming session in the garden between the hero (a young Karthik, who desperately tries his best to save the choreography gone horribly wrong) and the heroine (a deadpan Jikki, Gemini Ganesan's daughter who thankfully disappeared after this film) who seem content playing Catch-Catch with each other. And that this was directed by none other than Sridhar, who gave us great movies like "Kadhalikka Neramillai" and "Kalyana Parisu" with great songs picturized beautifully, just shows us how bad a swansong a great auteur can get.

The song is "Panivizhum Malarvanam" from "Ninaivellam Nithya (1982)". I always have loved Ilayaraja. My early childhood was spent astonishing relatives with renditions of "Sundari Kannal Oru Seithi" (Thalapathi) and "Innum Ennai Enna Seiyya Pogirai" (Singaravelan). All this before I was 5. When I was 5, "Roja" happened. A.R. Rahman became the rage of the day. I was swept off my feet. Ilayaraja faded away into the dark corners of my grey cells. When I was in 9th Std, I heard this song for the first time. But I was so mesmerized by its beauty that I could only half retain its tune and its lyrics. So I couldn't search the song out in the net. Then 2 years later, in my 11th Std, I heard it again. And this time I made sure to note the first lines. And I got the song. It was an eye-opener for me. It opened me to a world of music beyond Rahman. It introduced me to the beauty of Raja songs. The songs were a brilliant mix of light carnatic music with glimpses of western classical and contemporary pop. For a guy grounded in Carrnatic Music, but thankfully without any shackles preventing me from having a myopic vision towards other styles of music, this was perfect. With "Panivizhum Malarvanam" I had found my Valhalla in the music of Ilayaraja.

Of Cheaters and Quizzes

This is a comment I pasted on Arun "Vlad" TP's blog http://aruntp.wordpress.com/2009/04/06/the-misadventures-of-the-muscle-gang-a-pim-and-the-fuheads. Kindly go through it too.

Hey,great job mate. Such things piss one off when one is organizing a quiz. It pains to see good quizzers who come to your event for your sake and end up giving way to lesser worthy people because of malpractices.

I would use this forum to talk about what has happened thrice during Informalz quizzes including "Weakest Link and "Jeopardy". I am not giving names here, but people can figure out who I am referring to.

The best lady quizzer of our batch (who's the best BOB BITS never had IMHO) always graces our quizzes and as expected cracks the prelims. What's always queer is that the person sitting next to her always gets through to the finals having the same marks. What's even more queer is that the answers too match. These are obvious cases of cheap cheating which ensure that out Lady Quiz has one less opponent to deal with during the finals.

In events like "Weakest Link" where participants are eliminated after every round, this works to the favour of these slimy quiz swindlers as they get to sit next to each other. This ensures Mother Quiz doles away answers to her undeserving sidie in the quiz, creating a cartel on stage and eliminating better people on stage.

Many quizzers who I respect, including Psyche have been denied of an entry to the finals because of this con-women.

Finally, i must congratulate Uncle Sid, who while conducting "Weakest Link 2k7" pissed her off on stage so much (including questioning her questionable sex) that she left the quiz in a huff with her lackey, upon which, he recalled a guy who had been eliminated the previous round back tho the quiz saying "We now will have a true quizzer on stage!".

That I've written so much speaks strongly about how affected I am from these incidents of malpractices. People should sit down and find ways to eliminate this shit.

Ajay

PS: Hell, Ive written so much I think I'll post it in my blog and link u too.

The Strength of a Thousand Elephants

In my school days, occasionally there used to be these story-writing competitions. The major incentives these contests offered included a free set of pens, the chance to look cool before lesser-read classmates and more importantly a legitimate excuse for bunking classes. An early crushing truth that a well meaning English teacher revealed to me was that I would never be able to win any of these competitions as the judges weren't exactly known for their patience in deciphering Hieroglyphic scribblings of the students before evaluating their work. But with the carrot of incentives mentioned before dangling in front of me, I used to still go and give a shot at them. These competitions involved writing a Story with the Title or the Moral-of -the-Story or a sentence which should appear somewhere in the story being given. Sometimes, I used to reach the end of my story before realizing I had forgotten to include the sentence I was supposed to, so I would end the story in a convoluted manner with some character mouthing the singular sentence.

Gautam Vasudev Menon's Vaaranam Aayiram, touted as a film which surely would bring back nostalgic memories of pieces of your own life succeeded in bringing back this quirky detail from my schooldays when in the end mother Simran looks at son Suriya and mouths some incomprehensible "Thoozha-Tamizh" phrase beginning "Vaaranam Aayiram...". At that moment, I realized what a feel-good movie was, for I really felt good that I was not alone in having problems with including titular sentences in my works. Apparently Gautam suffers from it too.

"Vaaranam Aayiram" meaning " The Strength of a Thousand Elephants" is the starting line of a stanza in Aandal's "Naachiyar Thirumozhi" where she dreams of being carried by a procession 1000 elephants strong to her beloved Lord Ranganatha. A poetic title for a Tamil film in these times of "Pandi", "Villu" and "Dindugul Sarathy". Surely suggested by Gautam's default "aasthaana" lyricist ThamarI (that's her new spelling) like she suggested the other figurative titles of his works like "Pachaikili Muthucharam", "Vettayaadu Vilayaadu" (from old MGR songs) and "Kakka Kakka" (from the Kanda Shasthi Kavacham shlokas).

But Gautam had to do it. He had to make Simran blurt out the film's title in the end lest the audience is left wondering why the title was chosen in the first place.Though the paradox is, the prospective candidates who could end up liking the movie, the bourgeois urban youth who think in English and address "Mattu Pongal" as "Cow Pongal", wouldn't just get what she was hymning. As for the masses, it would be the last nail in a nail-infested coffin, if they remained seated till then that is. Had he simply left the title in the end, or as a song in the end- credits, it would have brought the film to the smooth flowing end it deserved. After all, people didn't protest to find out why his previous fare was called "PachaiKili MuthuCharam (PKMC)"

Having said that, I must point out that Gautam has made a film to which he has poured his heart out. The film works because it is intensely personal, we can literally feel Gautam's yearning for his lost dad. We can feel the intensity of the emotions that he must have gone through while crafting this tribute to his father, just like we feel Shah Jahan's love for Mumtaz oozing out of every minaret of the Taj Mahal. And it is this conviction of the director that turns our eyes blind to the film's follies.

We choose to ignore the native sensibilities (or the lack of it) of the director who makes the Dad Surya call Son Surya as "Kiddo" and the Mom Simran telling her children their dad "swept her off the feet". We choose to disregard the fact that the story offers nothing new in terms of story and content; its just old wine packaged in one nice glittering bottle called "First Half." But post-Interval, the director finds his bottle of sparkling wine has emptied itself and he has no stock left. But he has to entertain us for yet another eternity; it's only Interval; " Picture Khatam Nahin Hain. Aur Bhi Baaki Hain". So, not knowing what to do, he sets aside the maxim" If you start trying to please everyone, you'll end up pleasing none" and starts hurling at us, an assortment of small 100 ml soft drinks "Requiem for Sameera", "Hostage Drama", "Good son joins Army", "Another Love Story", "Another Hostage Drama", "Death of a Father" and so on. The end result is half his audience are bewildered and the other half are disgusted. But Gautam can take heart that these small sodas are at least more bearable than the acid of a second half that he threw at the audience with "PKMC".

No doubt, the individual segments are shot brilliantly, but they just don't gel. And the film coming as it is close on the heels of "PKMC", exposes the writing of Gautam once again. Like his previous fare, the film has a brilliant first half, but from there its one big journey downwards. Another failing in his works is that all the characters think like Gautam.As a result, all the characters appear to come alive from the world of Hollywood and English books, uttering phrases like "It was like a Rock Song!". People haven't forgotten his TN-Policemen-shouting -FREEZE antic in "VV". Gautam needs to go the Mani Ratnam way. In the early 90's Mani realized that his characters started sounding similar and the vision driving his stories started to get repetitive, he stopped writing the dialogues and entrusted it into the safe hands of Sujatha. Gautam needs to find a Sujatha for himself too, otherwise he would find his position as a director who appeals to urban sensibilities being usurped by a director whose characters can speak in different tongues.

Some friends of mine felt that the film was just a rehash of "Autograph" and "Thavamai Thavamirundhu". I beg to differ. Though at the surface it might look like "VA" is simply these films written for a hipper crowd, they are not even in the same league. Make no mistake, it is easier to make a "TT" because such gut-wrenching stories of fathers suffering for the sake of the family are available dime a dozen, and the treatment as such was flat in-your-face expression of Fatherly Love. However, Gautam shows his class here by making the father's character more of an inspirational presence. Except for one or two scenes, where it is revealed that he is struggling to make ends meet and where is admonished by a Seth for not honouring his debt payments, we are not really made aware of the trials and tribulations faced by Dad Suriya. The film is about Son Suriya, and the director doesn't get distracted much away from it. And the film is not emotionally manipulative like "TT", there is no warring Daughter-In-Law to make it look like a Mega Serial unfolding on the silver screen.

If at all the film has any value in the legacy market, it must be due to the fact that it is the last film, (at least as of now) of the Gautam-Harris combo. Maybe having realized this before embarking upon this project, the duo churn out song after song in the first half (as many as 5 in the frst half and only 2 in the second) , like a couple lovemaking like there was no tomorrow. The songs are catchy, and hence you are able to sit through the torrent of music unleashed. Harris as usual recycles some of his own work in the songs, and screws up the Background Score like always; but overall a Pass Mark for old time's sake.

But the biggest legacy of the film has to be the emergence of "SURIYA" the dependable actor. Suriya is adequate in the role of the caring Dad, reminding one of the late Raghuvaran in more than one occasion. But it is Suriya the son who carries the movie in his shoulder and walks away with all the honours. The 6 pack may be THE proof of his commitment to the character, but he looks equally convincing as the 17 year old Suriya who dances for the "Yethi Yethi" song (a not-so-apparent tribute to Kamal of the 80's with a poster of Satya and a dance which fleetingly resembles the "Raaja Kayya Vacha" song ). I can't imagine any other actor playing the roles essayed by Suriya with the possible exception of Kamal if he were lot younger. Here's waiting for Suriya's next.

Simran plays her part well, the other heroines Sameera Reddy and Divya Spandana (previously known as "Kuthu" Ramya) are adequate. The campus of University of California, Berkeley, has been beautifully shot by Ratnavelu, the cinematographer of Endhiran. This should please the Endhiran trackers, anxious about the work of this little known technician. Technically, the movie is chic and the songs too have been shot in a flowery manner with lot of sets used, though the graphics deployed to show the Madras of Yore in the "Mundhinam Parthene" song sticks out like a sore thumb like the initial portions of "Paartha Mudhal Naale" song from "VV" did.

Gautam Vasudev Menon gives another promising film with "Vaaranam Aayiram" and cements his place in making niche films targeted at the Multiplex Audiences. His next venture "Chennayil Oru MAzhaikkalam" pairs him up with A.R Rahman for the first time.Looks like the tables have turned since Harris Jeyraj replaced ARR in Shankar's "Anniyan". Gautam is a bold auteur, making films the way he wants to, though often he finds himself succumbing to commercial demands.

"VA" works because of Gautam's deep conviction and Suriya's stellar commitment in bringing his characters to life. When a film touches you like "VA" does, you tend to ignore its failings and emerge out of the theatre feeeling satisfied. So a big thumbs up for "VA".

Blogger's Itch

Why do we Blog?

A question that propped up in my mind while reading an article in "The Hindu" about how HR people are increasingly looking up to Blogs to determine their prospective employee's character, personal views, likes, dislikes and what not.

People use Blogs differently. There are people who pour their hearts out into their blog, so much that if the Blog had a soul of its own, it would juxtapose with the writer's own soul. There are those for whom a Blog is a medium to be what they are not in their real life. The anonymity that they get propels some people into developing an Alter Ego residing in Cyberspace, one which can do as it pleases, something like "The Mask" was for Stanley Ipkiss.

Then there are those who have not lost the etymology of Blog as a corrupted portmanteau of WeB Log. These are the people who use blogs to note down things they wouldn't wanna forget. Or maybe use it as a Log of their activities, business and/or personal.

Web-Savvy Journalists use their Blogs to publish their articles, inviting comments from readers. The comment space is often a Warfield, with one set of people justifying the author's stance pitted against another set baying for his blood. The journalist himself makes an appearance, commenting on other's comments of their own comments. Like BITSian Chemical Engineer turned Film Writer Baradwaj Rangan (IMHO the best Film Critic ever to grace Chennai) who feels his blog (http://www.desipundit.com/baradwajrangan/) helps him to connect with his readers like no other medium can offer. He even goes to the extent of questioning the necessity of the passive and inert Print Medium in a time when Television and the Internet have made news "interactive" like never before.

Then there are the "Specialist Blogs" in which a like-minded bunch hang out to pursue their hobbies like Quizzing, Solving Crosswords and the like.

Where do I fit in?

Well, when I started this blog, it was more of an experiment with a medium which was being talked about for the first time. Since then it has matured, along with its author hopefully, to this piece which makes it a compendium of dozen entries.

For me, the blog offers an environment to vent my feelings. It allows me to satisfy one of the most basic needs of Mankind: The need to be heard. Well, I know this contradicts the fact that the 10-15 odd readers who chance through these pages wont count much in terms of being heard.So it must mean more than that. Maybe it's the other basic aspiration of Mankind, Owning Property, Wanting a place that one can call one's own. My blog is a place where I rule, very much like my home. It grants me an unbridled Freedom of Expression, that I can't get elsewhere but at home. My writings are sporadic bursts, about things that move me into writing. Most of the articles are reviews of Movies, as they are stuff I wanna analyze and write about.

The randomness of my Blog Update reflects the fact that I write only when I feel the urge to talk about something. I am not writing to meet deadlines, not writing to do justice to fat cheques or legions of readers. I don't know how much of myself I've poured into this blog. My guess is not too much, there should be a lot more to ME than that meets the eye with this blog. If at all it reveals something, it is the period when am jobless enough to pursue Blogging. Almost all my articles are written during Holidays, when I don't have other things to worry about. Each blog takes nearly a day's labour to complete starting from the itch to write and conceptualization of the matter, though the writing may take an hour or two at the max.Such a luxury of time can't be got at BITS. Well, I guess am prattling too much about myself. So let's stop at that.

This blog is something like an Ergodic Picture of my Mind at the time of writing, albeit an incomplete one.

The reason I am keying this down is as a prelude to another article about something that has been bothering me, and no marks for guessing that is about Blogs too.

Dasavatharam - One Legend Ten Characters!

When P Vasu asks Kamal Hassan, "Nee Enna UlagaNaygana? (Are You a Universal Hero)", to which Kamal in his Dalit Christian Avatar Vincent Boovarahan replies in his Tirunelveli slang "Amaanle, Naan UlaganNayagan Then (Yes, I am the Universal Hero), you get reminded not for the first time and definitely not for the last time, what kind of film Kamal has attempted with his latest magnum opus "Dasavatharam".

Dasa is , read my lips, a MASS film. MASS not because the story carries weight (sorry for the bad pun), but because it assumes it has to first and foremost cater to MASSES who usually don't flock to Kamal films as fervently as they would to a Rajni Fare. So it has some of the most "In-Your-Face-Dumbing-Down" sequences, like the one where Balram Naidu looks down at Fletcher from a chopper and watches with some Binoculars, the deadly Virus multiplying, and a scene later, the Tsunami brings with it an Indian National Flag which pierces through Fletcher!

But then how does Kamal appease the "Classes" who form his hardcore audiences? Kamal takes them to a tour of movies that have still not been transliterated from Hollywood to its rhyming K version. Each Avatar caters to a particular set of people. For the Sci-Fi oriented youth and people who have grown up seeing STAR Movies and HBO, there is plenty of action with Bio-weapons, Govind-a Scientist who has to continually run to save himself and the world (somewhat like Will Simith in Enemy of the State),Fletcher- a mercenary with steely nerves whose only aim to retrieve the "vial" containing the deadly virus that I was talking about, no matter what it takes (reminding one of characters with a Singular Mission that Hollywood churns out regularly, like the Terminator series), Car chases shot in the night, etc. For those enamoured by Jackie Chan flicks, there is a Jap out for revenge.

Then for the people who come to Kamal movies for his comedy and timing, there's Balram Naidu, the bungling Gult RAW officer and Krishnaveni Paati, the lunatic nonagenarian lady.

For the devout there's Rangaraja Nambi, A Vaishnavite facing persecution from Veera Shavitie King Kulothunga Cholan (Napolean) in the 12th Century. For the atheists there is Govind, the scientist who also doubles up as the rationalist of the story.

For those in love with Vijayakanth style son-of-the-soil sermonizing protagonist, there is a classier version in Vincent Boovarahan, the Dalit Christian activist out to battle against Manal (Sand) Mafia.

Then there is Bush, who like his real life counterpart doesn't do much except fill space and footage, and occasionally startles you with the close semblance with the real Bush.

And last, if you are one who is neck deep into mega-serials filled with unbelievably binary shades of characters, there are 2 Avatars just for you. One who calls himself Avatar Singh is a pop-singer, wife-lover, and Cancer patient rolled into one.His high in the film is the "Oh Oh Sanam" song, delivered by the mesmerizing voice of Kamal himself, and the low is the way his Cancer is cured by stray bullets.

The other chap is the over 7 Feet tall Muslim Kalifulla Khan, who would probably rank as the most boring thing Kamal has attempted since Maharasan (1993).

So with such a recipe, which caters to all sections of the audience, you are bound to have a surefire hit in your hands. And yes, Dasa has been declared by Kamal himself to be the biggest hit of his career.

But all is not well, that ends well. The film has exposed Kamal the Writer's failings once again. The main problem with Kamal the Writer over the years has been an indulgence to show Kamal the Actor in as many scenes as possible, lest his fans go disappointed. This has resulted in great many wonderful stories going un-attempted as it might have resulted in Kamal the Actor getting lesser screen time.

Kamal the writer has other visible indulgences too, like ranting home his brand of philosophy and every now and then reminding viewers that atheists who are good at heart are better than people blinded by religion into helping others. So much so that one can't help wondering if Kamal wants to be known like that - an Atheist Do-gooder.
Maybe his films are a means for him to glorify his ideals and strengthen his own resolve in them.

This indulgence already cost him dearly with Anbe Sivam. What could have been a subtle but enjoyable Road Movie, dealing with the Culture Shock experienced by Maddy, representing today's go-getter as he meets an ideologically poles apart Kamal and is forced to undertake a journey with him through the "Real India"( with hazardous weather conditions for company), got transformed into a new dimension. One in which the story started dwelling more on Kamal's flashback, his love, his conflict with Padayachi Nambi (Naazar), the devout but merciless Industrialist. We got to see a notorious Umbrella Fight, and a well shot duet song (Poovasam) and a Bus accident. All this looked great, but it drove us away from the point of the story. Or was it the point of story at all in the first place? For such a great movie, the Nazeer character appeared nothing but a well drawn caricature. Just imagine what the story could have become if we removed the flashback portion of the movie and if Kamal and Maddy remained as unconnected in the end as they were in the beginning. The movie could have dwelt more on the bonding that develops between Maddy and him. It would have marked a new maturity for Tamil Cinema. But unfortunately it wasn't to be.

Getting back to Dasa, it's the same story here again. This time it suits the theme better, as the undercurrent here is the tension between various opposing forces, like Religion and Science. But the compulsions of getting back the Crores of money spent, meant that the film could only give a nod to many issues but couldn't go deeper into anything.

A point that was disturbing in the movie was the manner in which Kamal roughed up Religion and believers. When I was watching the movie with my friends, all of them believers, I could see many of them getting disturbed mildly by the dialogues and content in some of the scenes. Making Asin look dumb and having her shout "Perumale Perumale" while making her turning blind to sufferings of others does not qualify her for Moksha. Religion doesn't say we have to be like her. Using her weak character and juxtaposing it with the failings of Religion is akin to hiding its strength and magnifying its failings. If the aim was again to glorify good people who happen to be atheists, again it doesn't work. For the character of Govind turns out inadvertently into an irritating smart ass who gets away with the best lines in repartees and ends up winning any argument that arises. An example is his final statement "I am not saying God doesn't exist, I am only saying it would've been better if he had existed!" . Let me take back to Anbe Sivam where Kamal tells Maddy "Who said I dont believe in God, I believe in God, for me now YOU are God, as you've given blood to a fellow you've never met. That feeling in you is God"

Make no mistake, both the statements are awesome, but the characters saying them make it appear Smart-Ass.

And the Brahmin-Bashing in the film! Oh God! or Oh whatever-Kamal-believes-in! May better sense prevail upon the Dream Merchants of Kollywood into showing a community in a more responsible manner! I wonder how it's only the Brahmins who get charred and made fun of for their ways. Agreed, they were horrendous in the treatment they accorded to the so-called lower castes, but that was like 50 years ago.

Today, people have become more Class Conscious as Marx predicted, and they won't stand any such nonsense. So there is no point in harping around themes that have been overexploited over the ages.

Lastly, the promised Computer Graphics Revolution somehow doesn't seem to live upto its hype. The CG work, though the best in Tamil cinema so far, leaves a lot to be desired, whether in the 12th Century segment or the final Tsunami. But again, it could be because of the scale of the project involved and other budgetary constaints, though with 60 Crores I wouldn't be complaining of lack of funds.

Having said all that, I come to an important part of the discussion here. How to Enjoy Dasa?

Key to deriving happiness of the Rs. 120 spent on the movie, is to know what to expect. Dasa is a MASS film that should be viewed as a means of connecting the 10 Characters played by Kamal Hassan, weaving an interesting screenplay around these characters with a story that touches Chaos Theory, Butterfly Effect, Bio-Weapons, Tsunami etc. It also has an undercurrent of the clash between Science and Religion and to its credit is pretty open-ended in its Conclusion. The songs have been used to carry the story forward nicely. The screenplay is lightning fast, and I couldnt believe it was two hours into the movie already when the interval was announced. The pace slackens a bit post Interval, but that is to create a lull before the Tsunami of a climax. And don't forget the pains the man has taken up for two years to meet the challenges of portraying 10 characters. Seems he has spent more than 500 hours in Make-Up. Imagine the difficult situation for the technicians as they have to create layers and layers of the same shot, when there are multiple Kamals in the same scene. In one scene there are as many as 5 Kamal Hassan, all looking markedly different in their appearance and height!

So fasten your seat belts, have your popcorn by your side, switch off the devil in your mind expecting every Kamal movie to be a Mahanadhi, and get ready for 3 hrs of Entertainment, the way it's never been attempted before in Tamil Cinema!

Kuruvi - Where Eagles Dare and No one Else Should!

Few films leave you stunned, stupefied and fumbling for words when you sit down to write about it. Maybe it's because picking your thoughts and arranging them in a logical order is not possible after being through near 3 hours of massacre of precious Grey Cells. Presenting Kuruvi - Where Eagles Dare!

Let's start not at the beginning of the film but 6 months ago, when Dharanai would have knocked the doors of Vijay (as Bosey would put it Vijay Saar to fans). Presenting a One Act Play on "Making of Kuruvi"

Dharani: Hey, I have a brilliant script in my mind which flashed through my mind after spending 4 years in Gultland and watching nothing but Gult movies.

Vijay: Ooh, Is it a remake of some Gult movie? Nowadays they are charging high rates for the rights.

Dharani: Dont worry, its not a remake of ONE Gult movie, but at least 6 of them at last count. And with each iteration, the count increases (Snorts)

Vijay: That's great! Will it have scope for me to show my acting prowess? Actually I am enjoying every moment of showing off my histrionic skills while shooting for my next film ATM, where you know I play a double role. I've differentiated the two roles brilliantly, there is even a negative shade to one of the characters. I even spoke Hindi lines for the first time like "Andheri Mein Accident Hua, Ambulance Bhejao!" with such ease that it would put SRK to shame. I am sure my fans will lap it up. Finally this will show that eunuch Ajith that I can act better than him. Muhahahahahaha....With ARR composing the music and with my dancing skills, nothing can go wrong....Muhahahahaha

Dharani: (Torn between Laughter, Bewilderment and Diplomacy opts for the last one as it is most lucrative here)
I am happy to hear that. After all, the director is my assistant. The 'Ghilli' team can't go wrong.

Vijay: That's True. That reminds me, some ill-wishers are sneering that I've not given a true blockbuster which everyone enjoyed after Ghilli. They say that the fact that Thirupachi ran for 175 days is proof that man descended from apes. They say Sivakasi ran moderately only because their eyes couldn't bear the dazzle of Vikram's colourful Lungis in Maja. About the fate of Aathi and Sachin, dont even ask. They can't appreciate my generosity in promoting an upcoming hero like Ravi Krishna by acting in a small Guest Role which lasted for only 2 hours in a film that bore my character's name. And they even claim Gults are sneering at Pokkiri and say I am not Hero-Material compared to Mahesh Babu. 'These Gults are Crazy People!' (Tink! Tink! a la Obelix)

Dharani: Yes they are, but we need them to make films which run, so that we can copy it ditto from heroine to costume like Jayam Raja so beautifully does and then claim, we changed the script to suit Tamil Audience like P Vasu said after improvising Manichitrathaazhu.

Vijay: Hmm. OK, I've to get into my character now. Let's meet after ATM releases.

(Scene Shifts to 3 months later; sometime after Deepavali)

Sanjay (Vijay's Son): Dinam Dinam Dinam Deepaavaleeeeee....
Vijay: Shut Up, Sanjay. If you want sing Deepavali Songs, Sing "Deepavali, Deepavali, Deepavali Nee thaandi".
Dharani: Vijay Saar, Happy Deepavali!

Vijay: Ennayya Happy Deepavali, ATM has bombed badly. And worse, the rare breed of honest critics are panning it and raising a hue and cry over my inability to act. They are accusing me of murdering ARR's music. Is that my mistake? My fans love me doing all those gimmicks with my legs during dances. So I complied. My fans are used to Item Numbers after Interval. So i roped in Namitha. Now, Hollywood is threating to sue me for comparing her with Marylyn Monroe. I think I'll fly 2 US and apologize to her before she goes to the court.

Dharani: Uh, Sir, she's dead for more than 40 years.

Vijay: WHAT? Oh, good, one headache gone. And how many years since (looks into a sheet of paper) Jennifer Lopez died?

Dharani: Sir, he is alive and kicking ass.

Vijay: Oh no, I am done for. Even she is in the long list of people threatening to sue me. Not to mention the distributors who are out for my blood for "overpricing this piece of shit" in their own words. (Starts weeping)

Dharani: Dont worry Sir! I have the right recipe for you. The trouble with ATM was You tried to act. It's clear people dont want to put you into such difficulty. That's why I have just the right film for you where you just need to be there. It's called (holds his breath) "KURUVI"

Vijay: Ennathu Kuruviya? ( A reaction echoed later by the CM when he heard the title. The producer is First Grandson of the State) And why Kuruvi?

Dharani: Kuruvi is a guy sent abroad to places like Malaysia to smuggle stuff into an out of the country.

Vijay: Sounds cool. Whats the story?

Dharani: Your father, lets bring in Manivannan. He played the dad's role in Sivaji. So he will be ur Dad 2. Well, your dad is enslaved in a Quarry in Cuddapah along with hundreds of other workers who are subject to ill-treatement and torture under the hands of the local MLA Konda Reddy. Let's bring in Ashish Vidyarthi to play this role. He was villain to Rajni in Baba. On top of all this is Kocha, the villanous multimillionaire from Malaysia, who also happens to be the MLA's partner in quarry and the heroine's brother too. We can make his wife a mother-like figure to the heroine, who is engaged to Konda Reddy's brother! See how smartly I am linking stuff up. No one has tried anything like this. For Kocha's role we can bring in Suman. After all, he was the villain of Sivaji.

Vijay: Sounds just the role for me. Let the people be reminded that Ghilli was our previous outing together. So let's get Trisha as heroine. The movie should have chases with me holding Trisha's hands, just like Ghilli. Let Vidyasagar compose music, just like Ghilli. Let the opening song match my previous intro songs just like any one of my movie. It should not have any reason to be in the movie. So that, latecomers get value for their money.
There should be a theme which is similar to that of Ghili. Al the songs should easily reach across to the common man. Can we have the same songs as in Ghilli?

Dharani: That would'nt work with the urban masses.

Vijay : O, they come to my movie? In that case, we can have all songs almost similar in tune and situation to Ghilli. Make a song similar to Asai Asai from Dhool. In particular, there should be a kuthu number like Appidi Podu. Lets rope in Anuradha Sriram and KayKay again. We can even have the familiar "O-oo-oo" sequence in the song.

Dharani: What else sir?

Vijay: Nothing much. It should have the standard 5 songs, 5 fights routine.

Dharani: Sir, I was thinking about making potshots at our Thala (Vijay frowns), I mean Ajith by having you race on a car which can't move unless pushed and you winning it in style in the end, mouthing provocative statements to satisfying your fans' craving to whistle for anything.

Vijay: That's great! But won't fans complain its another Ghilli?

Dharani: You are overestimating your fans sir. Anyways, to prevent that, we will make Trisha innocent and slutty. Remember she as innocent and homely in Ghilli. We will even tattoo some crap in her boobs and make sure the cleavage gets prominence. We can cover women audience by claiming we focussed a lot on the heroine!

Vijay: TeeHee! This film will surely be a hit! Udayanidhi Stalin is the Producer, which means Kalaignar TV will promote our movie for free! And don't forget the reference to my fans as "Annan Thambi" and also have a scene of me paying reverence to "Superstar" in at least 2 songs.

Dharani: Sure Sir, have already added them.

Vijay: Approm enna, Shooting Start!!!